So I was at the store this morning buying lemonade and vaseline, and when I'd finished browsing and texting people strange messages, I got into line at the checkout aisle. There was a lady in front of me standing by the check writing board so I stood back about 5 feet from her. Gave her a wide berth. Didn't want her to think I was trying to steal her banking information or anything (especially since I was).
All of a sudden I could literally feel a person standing behind me. He was standing way too close to me. I could feel his hot breath on my neck. This made me very uncomfortable. I like my space. So I moved up a little bit. The person moved up too. This was getting weird. He was like one inch behind me. So I moved up a little bit more. He moved too. Now I was upset. I couldn't move up anymore because then I'd be infringing on the territory of the lady in front of me. That wouldn't be OK.
After about 30 seconds he still hadn't moved back. I could still feel his breath. This would not stand. I turned around to face him.
Me: Can you just back off a little!!??
Guy: I only got THREEEEEEE Dollars!!
I had just yelled at a retarded guy. Great. Now I am the world's biggest jerk. People were looking at me with expressions of shame.
Me: Oh, um..... nevermind.
Guy: THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
I took my lemonade and vaseline and left. I'm a jerk.
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1 comment:
Lemonade and vaseline?
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